Knowing and believing.

I'm learning that there is a difference between knowing and believing. I know that God loves me...but do I believe that God loves me? I know God exists...but do I truely believe it? I know it's okay not to be perfect...but I sure don't believe it. Knowing is the recognition of something to be true. Believing is accepting it with your heart and contributing it to your lifestyle. One cannot believe something without knowing it; however, one can know something yet not believe it. So how do we connect the two? It's not easy and I can't seem to find a formula. It is indeed a process. The bridge from knowing to believing is one that I'm struggling to cross but I'm taking it one step at at time. Once I reach the other side, I'll elaborate. Because for now, I believe there is a difference but I don't know how to connect them.

A few things to ponder.

• Speak in anger and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret.
• We must embrace pain and use it as fuel for our journey.
• Don't begin taking down walls until you know why you put them up.
• Strength doesn't come until you realize your weakness.

Running into empty space.

Why is it when I'm lost, I tend to run faster? I don't know where I'm supposed to go or what I'm supposed to do, yet I run quickly away. What I really need to do is completely stop. And think. And listen. And breathe. But it seems so much easier to run, to not think, to tune out, and to hold my breath. WHY?

Wonders of the heart.

The heart is a wonderous, mysterious, and powerful thing. It is the home of love, passion, decisions, hopes, and fears. It is where God placed his Holy Spirit for a reason. He picked the most vulerable, yet strongest place to live within us. A heart can be broken very easily, but it can never be destroyed. It can be damaged many times, but it has the ability to heal everytime. I'm just so dumbfounded by this power. Your eyes can be blind, your ears unable to hear, your mouth mute, your mind unable to think clearly....but your heart can never be kept from loving. The heart is our core. It guides everything we do. If we don't listen to our heart, we can't truly move forward. I'm so thankful for God's purposful placement inside my heart. There is no better place.

Help.

I'm scared. Scared of not having enough strength. Scared of not pleasing God, others, or myself. Scared of failing. Scared of ending up alone. Scared of not being good enough. Scared of not being loved. Scared of not finding fulfillment in the right places. Scared of losing who I am. I can only be so strong for so long. Please help me God.

Only you.

The strings have pulled and tugged. My heart is now wide open, vulnerable, and afraid. But my heart is all yours and it lies in your hand. You'll protect it and heal it. You're teaching me to lean on you with complete trust. I may fall, but your arms will catch me everytime. You're teaching me what truely matters. I rest in your peace, confident in the fact that you know my plan and purpose. I am not alone because every single step I take, you are taking with me. You didn't promise a life without struggles. Instead, you promised a life with an abundance of your love. And once we have that, we don't need anything else. True happiness comes only through living in you. Help me to do just that. I want you to be my everything. Each time I get stuck, give me a push in the right direction. Each time I stumble, remind me of the reason why I'm here. That reason is you, and only you.

Letter from Peace.

I hear your cries and I feel your pain. We used to be close and tightly knit but I was stolen from you. You've pleaded for my return but I'm unable to come. I deeply wish I could be there with you. I lived off your smiles, laughs, and moments of embrace. I'm straining against the boundaries that are keeping me away. One day I will be free. At that moment I'll wrap my arms tightly around you and never let go. There is one who cares and one who knows our bond. He will bring us back together in due time. He's waiting for the most ideal moment. The boundaries will be lifted and we can smile, laugh, and embrace once again. His plan is perfect so stay strong. My time of absense won't last. He told me everything will be okay. It's his promise.

Always Yours,
Peace